Monday, December 31, 2012

Everyone slips up

OK - I had be delaying this post. Hoping some miracle would fix it and I would never have to admit it. It would just go away. My weight loss journey has derailed. This is embarrassing.

I started out this year weighing in at 230 pounds.  I started doing MyFitnessPal and logging everything I ate and drank. I found out my biggest problem was portion control. I was losing weight like crazy, and some of my friends thought I just kidding. But when I started I was seeing big numbers drop off I think in the first 2 months I lost like 25 pounds. By the time I went to the beach in June I was down to 190lbs and feeling great!

Here is where the crash happened. I stopped doing MyFitnessPal.  It held me accountable, but it worked.  I started trying to guess where I was calorie-wise for the day. Estimate my portions. Guess what? I wasn't ready.

I put on 5 pounds, and justified to myself it was just my body leveling off.... then it was 10 pounds, and I thought that's not bad for just being careful on what I eat. Now today I am at 209lbs. I kept telling myself that its winter and I will be better in Spring, I can't exercise as much as I want to....etc.

You know what I found out... I'm a good liar, and I was in bad enough place that I wanted to believe the lies. When I justify I am still down over 20 pounds from where I started, no admitting that I am actually up 18 pounds from my lowest.... there is a problem.

I have a weak mind when it comes to food. It tastes so good. It can cheer you up. Heck you can drink your daily allowance of calories if you are not careful.... 1500 calories is not hard to do in this super sized Nation. Don't even get me started on sweets - they are my Nemesis. Schuler's is my drug dealer.

I am putting this out there to be held accountable. I need help. I want to get back to my 190lb self (or better). I felt great there. If you see me out and about and eating something I shouldn't, or thinking about buying junk I don't need - yell at me! I will no longer be the trash can after meals, if I don't want to throw it out I will save it in some Tupperware. I do not need to eat it.

No one likes to admit mistakes, but I screwed up. I got to be thin, liked it and lied to myself about maintaining it. I know life is a journey, and sometimes it is hard, but I do want to be healthier and lose the weight again.

There it is...

That is all I have to say about that.

Friday, December 21, 2012

It's the end of the world as we know it...

Well it looks like the Mayans didn't get the Apocalypse right.... we are still here.
My favorite picture that explained it....
This last weekend was the 2nd in the series of the Dayton Indoor Time Trials on Sunday. This would be Carisa's first time at this and a chance for me to better my time.  After church when everyone was in Sunday school, I ran home loaded the bikes up and packed lunch. I went back and picked everyone up and we headed down to Club 51 to get it on! We got there in time to see Alix Payton in action, of course setting the bar for women that day (and of course no one beat her). I got Carisa set up on a trainer for warm up and tried to explain as much as I could to her without over-whelming her. She was in the next race, with George, McCarty and Dan P (and two others). For her first time she did great. Her goal was 20 minutes and she missed it only by 11 seconds (and when she finished she said she could have gone harder, but she didn't know what to expect). Still ended up 1st in her age group, Great Job! Next I was up. My previous indoor time trial I had knocked 30 seconds off my previous best.. I was hoping for more but I knew it would be tough. Before the start I was told about the guy on the end of the row racing against me. We had a run in....
It was at Criterium Practice race in Spring. We were racing around the Kilkare track and he was in front of me following a really quick (and very nice) kid in a LionHeart jersey. As we came through the pits (which is 8 lanes wide and exits in 2 lanes) the LionHeart kid swung out wide to fall to the back of the pack and this guy was wheel sucking and followed him. As the LionHeart slowed to fall to the back the main group which I was in kept up the pace and started going around and straight out the 2 lanes we were in... as this guy on the end realized what was happening he jerked the bike to the right and banged into me and nearly took the pack out as we were rolling above 20mph. Everyone in the group yelled at him and he turned around and looked at me and yelled back to me to "Hold my line"..... really? If I did hold my line I would have mashed this guy flatter than a pancake. He ran his mouth to everyone for the next 2 laps and then dropped out of the race before the end and left while we were still racing. 
So anyway, there he was in my heat. Where the bikes are on the trainer, and there are no variables that would sway an advantage to either person. Just Mano a Mano. The race started and this guy blew out of the start like a rocket... he put 400 feet into me in the first 1/4 mile - he was pushing over 400 watts and it only just begun. Joshua Bozue was in my heat also and I was ahead of him. If you know him I should NOT be ahead of him, he is fast! So I was starting to panic if this guy was so much faster than me and Joshua there was no chance.... but in a 10K race there was plenty of time left. I just focused on Joshua and figured use him as a pace and just try to keep the gap down between us. Joshua caught me about 2 miles in and then his gap kept growing (which I totally expected). I just tried to limit the amount of gap. I would look over and see him with the pain face and I knew I wasn't the only one suffering. And guess what... the gap to first was closing to Joshua and me.. there was the crack. It's on. As we worked over the course I was breathing like a vacuum cleaner - sucking in all the air I could. Heart rate in the 180's almost all the time. We both caught the guy on the end and passed him and it must have hurt as he slowed more... the gap jumped on him. Someone was next to him was coaching him, cheering him on and he was back at it...  his loss has started to level off and he was keeping up just not gaining or losing anymore.
I was able to find a new pain place that day..  when I was suffering and was spinning the pedals over hanging on, when I saw Joshua suffering.. it almost lighted my suffering. I was able to push harder... I would click down one more gear and spin it back up the same. Going faster than before and deeper into the suffering than before. I only realized this at the end of the race... If I could have figured this out earlier I hope that I would have been faster still. Joshua finished just over 15 minutes (15:14) and I was only feet behind him. Holy cow I think I am going to get a new Personal Record. I kicked it down and pushed. I finished at 16:22 - exactly 30 seconds better than the race before! I did it. Another improvement. So far I have knocked a full minute off last years best time and I feel like I have more. I hope to improve next time too.
That is all I have to say about that...

Sunday, December 2, 2012

A great start to December...

What a beautiful start to December.

I got out with Carisa on Saturday for a 100K bike ride. A metric century, 62 miles, more miles than degrees. We met up with George, McCarty and Smith at the Villa Road bike path. Headed out on the old Tuesday night ride with all the 'fingers'.  Little did Carisa know that meant after getting to Urbana and starting our way back as we ride down Middle Urbana road we take all the hilly roads down to Urbana road and back (yes that includes Dallas Road, County Line, Willow Road and Weber Road - there are the fingers).

Once we did the ride and got back to the start we reloaded our water bottles knowing that we still had the Snyder Domer climb and headed out. Carisa tried to punish me as we rolled into Tremont City. She asks "Where is that cemetery hill climb?" I'm like are you sure? So we turn right and head up, then back down to town. She says I think its quicker to go back up the cemetery... I'm like are you serious?  So we U-turn and head back up the hill and back down. I saw 16% on the cemetery hill climb. Craziness....  So as we get closer and closer to home we realize that we are going to be very close to 60 miles... but we need to make sure we break it so we go past our house and go nearly to North Hampton and back home.  We had well over 2,000 feet of climbing, which is great for Ohio! Carisa is now I think like 27 miles from her goal for the year, and I am 315 short of my mileage. Days like this are a gift, you have to take advantage.

Get out and ride!

That's all I have to say about that.